With TSA's announcement of "enhanced" security checks at the airports, they've come out with a new list of slogans to improve their image:
01. Can’t see London , can’t see France … unless we see your underpants
02. We’re the creepy uncle of federal agencies
03. You’re in good hands with TSA
04. Pants on the ground
05. 2-4-6-8, we grab your junk or you’ll be late
06. Under Obamacare, this counts as your annual physical
07. It’s not a grope, it’s a “freedom pat”
08. Don’t worry, my hands are still warm from the last guy
09. No shirt, no shoes, no pants… Have a nice flight
10. You can’t spell molestation without TSA
11. If we said you body was a security risk, would you hold it against us?
12. Consult a physician if pat-downs last more than 4 hours
13. Sometimes you feel like a grope, sometimes you don’t
14. We’d offer you a cigarette, but this is a smoke free facility
15. TSA Club Card: with every 12 pat-downs, you get a free reach-around
16. The Few. The perverts. The TSA
17. Putting the T & A in TSA
18. Grope and change! Yes, we can!
19. We put our right hand in, we pull our right hand out, we put our left hand in and we shake it all about!
20. We are the people your mother warned you about
21. TSA: If we guarded the border, there would be no illegal aliens
22. TSA: Or as it’s known in the industry, “second base”
23. We feel your anger
24. We handle more nuts than a squirrel
25. We palm more balls than the NBA
26. ALL YOUR JUNK ARE BELONG TO US
27. If we don’t get off, you don’t get on
28. Don’t grope me, Bro!
29. We wear the glove, you bear the love!
30. Before you fly the friendly skies, I want to feel your silky thighs
31. Hickory , dickory dock, give us a chance we’ll grab your… well, you get the idea
32. Who’s your Daddy?
33. No need to pee in a cup, we just want to feel you up
Thanks to Genevieve,